Go Back   Two Wheel Fix > General > Off Topic

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 12-24-2009, 03:05 AM   #1
derf
token jewboy
 
derf's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Moto: CBR 900, KLR ugly ass duckling, Gas Man
Posts: 10,799
Default Holy Duck (possibly NSFW)

Duck sex is far more interesting than it has any right to be, due to the twisted nature of the birds' genitals. Male and female ducks have corkscrew-shaped sex organs which spiral in different directions. Now we know why.

Ducks are known for their bizarre penises, stretching up to 20cm in size in an anti-clockwise spiral. That's an impressive organ for a bird often only 60cm long. The females, on the other hand, have vaginas that spiral clockwise, opposite to their menfolk. Ducks also engage in what is politely termed "forced copulation", where the male ducks attempt non-consensual sex with the female, and explosively extend their penises with a technique that takes less than half a second.

This forceful mating is something the females try to avoid. Luckily, evolution is on their side. Female ducks have evolved vaginas that spiral clockwise, and contain sharp turns, which scientists believe were used to prevent insemination by unwanted suitors. This theory has finally been tested by enterprising researchers at Yale, with too much time and glassware on their hands. With sets of cylindrical glass tubes shaped into clockwise or anti-clockwise spirals, they tested how easily the penis advanced through various vaginal configurations. The clockwise vaginas managed to stop the intruding organ, protecting the female duck form unwanted advances.

In fact, the majority of forced copulations don't result in fertilization, and it appears the two sexes are involved in an arms race over their genitalia, with males evolving new attacks and the females defences. The twisted vaginas can completely stop the penis from its explosive exertion, preventing unwanted genes from being passed on. This helps stop undesired advances, and lets females retain control over who will reproduce successfully with them.

It may not be a vagina dentata, but it's a close approximation.

http://vimeo.com/8342932
__________________
derf is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-24-2009, 04:35 AM   #2
Dave
Chaotic Neutral
 
Dave's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Cherry Hill NJ
Moto: GV1200 Madura, Hawk gt
Posts: 13,992
Default

ok that just pegged my wtfometer. im goin to bed
__________________
TWF Post whore #6
Dave is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-24-2009, 09:10 AM   #3
Smittie61984
I give Squids a bad name
 
Smittie61984's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Fly Over State
Moto: 1996 CBR600 F3 (AKA the Flying Turd)
Posts: 4,742
Default

WTF?

I did see two ducks try and rape a duck while camping at a lake. They went ape shit on that thing. My buddy got it on film but I haven't seen him in 3-4 years so no clue where it's at.
__________________
lifts - R.I.P.
Smittie61984 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-24-2009, 09:27 AM   #4
Trip
Hold mah beer!
 
Trip's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: 80 Miles South of Moto Heaven
Moto: 08 R1200GS
Posts: 23,268
Default

Apparently human woman want to be raped because they didn't evolve their vaginas into a puzzle.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by ebbs15 View Post
according to the article tell him to drink ginger tea...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tigger
Whatever,Stoner is a bitch! O.J. Simpson has TWO fucked knees and a severe hang nail on his left index finger but he still managed to kill two younger adults,sprint 200 feet to his car (wearing very expensive,yet uncomfortable Italian shoes) and make his get a way!!!
Trip is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-24-2009, 10:20 AM   #5
Particle Man
Custom User Title
 
Particle Man's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Central NY
Moto: 2003 SV650S
Posts: 14,959
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trip View Post
Apparently human woman want to be raped because they didn't evolve their vaginas into a puzzle.
No, the puzzle is just the rest of them.
__________________
I'm not "fat."
I'm "Enlarged to show texture."


Handle every stressful situation like a DOG: If you can't eat it or hump it, pi$$ on it & walk away.
Particle Man is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-24-2009, 07:52 PM   #6
Kerry_129
Semi-reformed Squid
 
Kerry_129's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 531
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Particle Man View Post
No, the puzzle is just the rest of them.
Plus-muddafuggin-one!

That's some twist....

Talk about getting screw....nevermind.
Kerry_129 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-24-2009, 10:28 AM   #7
Dave
Chaotic Neutral
 
Dave's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Cherry Hill NJ
Moto: GV1200 Madura, Hawk gt
Posts: 13,992
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trip View Post
Apparently human woman want to be raped because they didn't evolve their vaginas into a puzzle.
win
Dave is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-24-2009, 10:40 AM   #8
marko138
DefenderOfTheBuelliverse
 
marko138's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Parts Unknown
Moto: Buell XB12R
Posts: 18,585
Default

Won't be watching that vid.
__________________


Quote:
Grandma said she doesn't want you here when she gets back because you've been ruining everybody's lives and eating all our steak.
marko138 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-24-2009, 09:35 AM   #9
racedoll
AMA Supersport
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Moto: '04 Kawasaki ZX6RR
Posts: 3,392
Default

This is just too much for morning comprehension. But thanks.
racedoll is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-24-2009, 09:46 AM   #10
pauldun170
Serious Business
 
pauldun170's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: New York
Moto: 1993 ZX-11 2008 CBR1000rr
Posts: 9,723
Default

fap fap fap QUACK!!!
__________________


Quote:
Originally Posted by Dave View Post
feed your dogs root beer it will make them grow large and then you can ride them and pet the motorcycle while drinking root beer
pauldun170 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
corkscrew duck cock, dick duck derf, vagina puzzle


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:29 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions Inc.