Stimulus checdk

[pauldun170]

Stimulus Check

Sometime this year, we taxpayers will again receive another 'Economic Stimulus' payment.
This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by using a Q & A format:

Q. What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment ?

A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q.. Where will the government get this money?

A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money ?

A. Only a smidgen of it.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment ?

A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?

A. Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

* If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart, the money will go to China or Sri Lanka ....

* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs.

* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India , Taiwan or China .

* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico , Honduras and Guatemala ..

* If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea ....

* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan .

* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.

Instead, keep the money in America by:
1) Spending it at yard sales, or

2) Going to ball games, or

3) Spending it on prostitutes, or

4) Beer or

5) Tattoos.

(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S. )
Conclusion:
Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day !
No need to thank me, I'm just glad I could be of help.

[shmike]

Thanks, Paul.

2009 Welcomes you.

[pauldun170]

Originally Posted by shmike

Thanks, Paul.

2009 Welcomes you.

Awesome!!
I'm younger than I was before I posted it.

BRB - Have to see if some these gray hairs disappeared.

[Homeslice]

it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.

Not to mention that a higher % of the products rich people buy are imported

Aston Martins/Maseratis/Ferraris/etc. (how many truly rich people do you know who buy Corvettes?)
South American marble slabs
Italian suits
Imported furniture (often using illegal wood)
Foreign vacations
Artwork

[Krabill]

I know a couple rich people who drive Ford pickups. One of them actually has 3 Ford pickups . . . and a Ferrari . . . and a Porsche

[Particle Man]

I laughed

[Smittie61984]

It hought Anheuser Busch was owned by a Dutch/Denmark/some obscure European country company

[askmrjesus]

Originally Posted by Smittie61984

It hought Anheuser Busch was owned by a Dutch/Denmark/some obscure European country company

Inbev- Belgium

For an obscure European company, they're doing pretty well. They sell about 25% of the beer that's drank on this planet.

JC

[Smittie61984]

Originally Posted by askmrjesus

Inbev- Belgium

For an obscure European company, they're doing pretty well. They sell about 25% of the beer that's drank on this planet.

JC

Belgium's are responsable for King Leopold II. I refuse to drink their blood beer and support their blood industry.

[fasternyou929]

Originally Posted by Smittie61984

Belgium's are responsable...