02-01-2009, 04:15 AM | #1 |
Ride Like an Asshole
Join Date: Feb 2008
Moto: nothing...
Posts: 11,254
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Honeycomb...
So my folks are staying with me... been here since Christmas and will be here until they close on their new house here in FL... Anywho, they LOVE Publix and are crackwhores for anything buy one, get one free. They come home with shit they'd normally never buy because of the deal... Typical American excess consumers.
One of their most recent purchases was two giant boxes of Honeycomb cereal. Never been a huge fan, but it's ok... I like the ease of cereal so I've been eating some... I've come to the conclusion... Honeycomb makes me poop. I thought it was a fluke thing until tonight... I pounded a giant bowl for dinner around 8pm... and after watching the fights at a buddy's house, it was a photo finish getting back to the crib, in the door, leg brace off, and ass onto the toilet seat. I literally took the biggest shit I've ever taken in my entire life... Started out as a solid log... decent diameter and probably a foot long... then a couple turds of similar diameter, but only a couple inches long each... a couple big farts, then Honeycomb disaster. I dropped a pile of soft serve that could have filled four very large cupped hands. After the dizziness subsided, I stood up to survey the damage and knew immediately, there was no way this shit was going down... It took, no BS, like 8 flushes to get all the poo down... amazingly, the toilet never really clogged for more than a second or two... Just as amazing was the fact that it only took two wipes to clean up, though the second one was merely a precautionary measure. So... long story short... Honeycomb makes you poop like an Olympic athelete on softball sized Ex-Lax suppositories. |
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