texts from last night

[Cory]

(845): i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low

(513): Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs

(757): DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
(703): I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.

hilarious