So you want to go on a Safari?

[t-homo]

Originally Posted by Trip

On my honeymoon cruise a couple weeks ago, we went on a holland america cruise and it was full of blue hairs and we were the only honeymooners on the cruise, 90% of the cruisers were over 50. Well we had a lifeboat drill and they said women, children and old people first. I said "fuck that, I am pushing these old farts into the water and taking myself a spot on the lifeboat. The old fucks had their turn." Needless to say the 800 blue hairs surrounding me didn't appreciate it, but andrea gave a chuckle.

No joke, they are going to die soon anyway.

[smileyman]

So then i wake up and see this....

[Particle Man]

Originally Posted by smileyman

So then i wake up and see this....

it's ok when you can smell the pussy but when the pussy smells YOU... that's a problem.

[neebelung]

Originally Posted by smileyman

So then i wake up and see this....

Hmmm... antelope breath!

[jgalt]

Note to self: "Invite mother in-law to Safari!"

[PhiSig1071]

Runflats FTW.

[smileyman]

I love Wikipedia!

Thus, although lionesses can reach speeds of 59 km/h (40 mph),[60] they can only do so for short bursts[61] so they have to be close to their prey before starting the attack. They take advantage of factors that reduce visibility; many kills take place near some form of cover or at night.[62] They sneak up to the victim until they reach a distance of approximately 30 metres (98 ft) or less. Typically, several female lions work together and encircle the herd from different points. Once they have closed with a herd, they usually target the closest prey. The attack is short and powerful; they attempt to catch the victim with a fast rush and final leap. The prey is usually killed by strangulation,[63] which can cause cerebral ischemia or asphyxia (which results in hypoxemic, or "general," hypoxia). The prey may also be killed by the lion enclosing the animal's mouth and nostrils in its jaws[4] (which would also result in asphyxia). Smaller prey, though, may simply be killed by a swipe of a lion's paw.[4]
Males attached to prides do not usually participate in hunting, except in the case of larger quarry such as giraffe and buffalo. Bachelor male lions without a pride of their own are forced to hunt. Male lions have also been observed and recorded hunting in groups.[citation needed]

Young lions first display stalking behavior around three months of age, although they do not participate in hunting until they are almost a year old. They begin to hunt effectively when nearing the age of two.[76]

Most lionesses will have reproduced by the time they are four years of age.[77] Lions do not mate at any specific time of year, and the females are polyestrous.[78] As with other cats, the male lion's penis has spines which point backwards. Upon withdrawal of the penis, the spines rake the walls of the female's vagina, which may cause ovulation.[79] A lioness may mate with more than one male when she is in heat;[80] during a mating bout, which could last several days, the couple copulates twenty to forty times a day and are likely to forgo eating. Lions reproduce very well in captivity.

While lions do not usually hunt people, some (usually males) seem to seek out human prey; well-publicized cases include the Tsavo maneaters, where 28 railway workers building the Kenya-Uganda Railway were taken by lions over nine months during the construction of a bridge over the Tsavo River in Kenya in 1898, and the 1991 Mfuwe man-eater, which killed six people in the Laungwa River Valley in Zambia.[126] In both, the hunters who killed the lions wrote books detailing the animals' predatory behavior. The Mfuwe and Tsavo incidents bear similarities: the lions in both incidents were larger than normal, lacked manes, and seemed to suffer from tooth decay. The infirmity theory, including tooth decay, is not favored by all researchers.[citation needed] An analysis of teeth and jaws of man-eating lions in museum collections suggests that, while tooth decay may explain some incidents, prey depletion in human-dominated areas is a more likely cause of lion predation on humans.[127] In their analysis of Tsavo and man-eating generally, Kerbis Peterhans and Gnoske acknowledge that sick or injured animals may be more prone to man-eating, but that the behavior is "not unusual, nor necessarily 'aberrant'" where the opportunity exists; if inducements such as access to livestock or human corpses are present, lions will regularly prey upon human beings. The authors note that the relationship is well-attested amongst other pantherines and primates in the paleontological record.[128]


A man-eating lion in British East AfricaThe lion's proclivity for man-eating has been systematically examined. American and Tanzanian scientists report that man-eating behavior in rural areas of Tanzania increased greatly from 1990 to 2005. At least 563 villagers were attacked and many eaten over this period—a number far exceeding the more famed "Tsavo" incidents of a century earlier. The incidents occurred near Selous National Park in Rufiji District and in Lindi Province near the Mozambican border. While the expansion of villagers into bush country is one concern, the authors argue that conservation policy must mitigate the danger because, in this case, conservation contributes directly to human deaths. Cases in Lindi have been documented where lions seize humans from the center of substantial villages.[129]

[OneSickPsycho]

Originally Posted by Rider

[IMG]http://i128.]

That kid looks EXACTLY like one of my cousins.

[t-homo]

I really just read that whole fuckin wikipedia article.